PRIDE: Arjan Spannenburg talks art and identity
Raw, tender, and somewhat introspective, Arjan Spannenburg puts the coming-of-age search for identity at the forefront of his work. In powerful compositions, mostly in black-and-white, his photographs offer a glimpse into the lives of LGBTQ+ adolescents during a pivotal and uncertain time.
Through his lens, we witness individuals whose quiet plea for support, understanding, and love deeply resonates with viewers, prompting them to consider the balance between vulnerability and self-expression, especially in the context of exploring and affirming their sexual and gender identities.
As ‘Exploration of Identity’ continues to tour art’otels in Berlin, London and Amsterdam as part of our ‘Pride Through the Lens’ exhibition, we sit down with the man himself to talk through all things art and identity.
Tell us a little about yourself.
My name is Arjan Spannenburg, I’m from the Netherlands, born on Texel (the small/big island north of Amsterdam). I work in the army, as well as a photographer — mainly as an artist because I like to create my own stores and images. I’ve done that since 2018 professionally. Before that I did a professional photography course in Amsterdam for five years part-time next to my work in the army. Since then, I kept going, creating my own artwork and doing what I like to do most.
What would you say is your theme in art?
It’s mostly selfish — it’s about me. But it’s also about the people in the photo. It’s about growing up, the things you run into, or things that are somewhat difficult or interesting. In society, we always think guys are strong; most military personnel are expected to be ready to fight, but there is always a layer beneath it. You can be very strong, but you can be vulnerable as well. I recognise parts of myself in them. Sometimes it’s because they’re vulnerable, they’re lonely, sad, or very strong or inspiring. If I see myself in them though, I usually ask them to work on a project for me.
What have you learnt over the years by exploring such individuals?
Everybody is tough but vulnerable at the same time. Everyone has their own issues. I mainly started photographing guys, but having shot lesbians, transgender and straight people, it’s clear we all have the same insecurities for some reason. Whether it’s something you experienced, taught by your parents, by the culture or by the environment, everybody has their own insecurities, but also their own strengths. And sometimes, the wrong elements come through more than the right ones. Sometimes you get very insecure, but in other moments you’re very secure and sure of yourself. It’s about finding the balance between being insecure and being very strong.
How do you get people to open up; to be vulnerable in front of you?
Usually, I just ask. But during the shoot, it’s about creating an environment. If I want to take a photo where someone feels vulnerable, I need to get them to that point. Using music, the light, the environment you create, all those elements together, and talking about stuff, it usually works. The topics we talk about during a photoshoot sometimes go rather deep. That makes the subject turn into themselves, and you get the chance to capture photos of someone who’s very strong and still in themselves. It’s playing with all kinds of elements, talking, and being very open. I share the things that I’ve conquered in my life and people will tell them what’s burdening them and how they deal with life. Usually, that works pretty good.
Why do you mostly shoot in black and white?
Colour can be very distracting. If you want to really catch the emotion of a person, black and white usually works better because a lot of skin colour gets lost. It really gets to the emotion. I don’t care about what’s in the background. I want the person to be the focus; it needs to be about that.
Who is this exhibition for? What would you like people to get from it?
There’s about 10% of the world that just hate people. They hate everybody that is different from them. And there is also a small group of people, also about 10%, that don’t care about anything. Just as long as everybody’s happy, they’re happy. But the majority of people have no idea about other cultures or other people. And the rainbow community is just another culture. It’s important for people to see, understand and realize that not everybody is the same. We’re just different, not dangerous. And we have a right to be there just as everybody else.
Let’s talk a little bit about Pride. What does pride mean to you?
For me, Pride is really a form of resistance. It’s asking for the attention of the world. It’s about being yourself and having the right to be the way you want to be. And it’s still needed. In the Netherlands, we think we’re already there. But if you only do the party part, the violence comes back again. During Pride Utrecht, unfortunately there were some people there who felt the need to harass me. We need to raise attention for our existence all over the world. We need to fight for liberty, for everybody that is a minority group.
How was the experience for you coming out?
It was conflicting — it’s probably why I’m so active in pursuing a better world. I grew up religious, then joined the army which wasn’t a very inclusive organisation. They try to be, but they still fail. It took me until I was 38 before I came out of the closet, and even then, it took me about two years to settle and accept who I was. When you’re young and you realise you might be gay, it’s hard. The longer you wait, the more difficult it gets. It’s easy to lose yourself and become estranged. That’s why I made the exhibition.
The trigger was actually a colleague of mine in the army that said, ‘I have nothing against gay people, I just don’t want to see them’. We were just chatting casually, like ‘what did you do this weekend’? I showed him some of my work and he was upset; he didn’t want to see that part of me. And that really struck me. Like, at work, you want me to be a different person, and I was like ‘fuck this’, it’s not going to happen again. I’m not going back into the closet; you have to deal with it.
What would you say to young people who are finding themselves now?
It’s difficult. You should stand up for who you are, come out, but it’s also about finding the right people and a safe place. One of the things we have is chosen family. I have a very big family now, which is awesome, but if you’re in a very strong religious society, it will be more difficult.
Even here in the Netherlands, being called gay has a negative connotation in schools and sport. It influences you on your mindset on coming out. If you’ve grown up somewhere that hates the rainbow community, you start to believe it and it gets difficult to accept yourself. I have a friend of mine who was very in the closet, almost homophobic and straight-acting (a word I really hate) with his friend, but in the end, they were both gay. It’s real stupid. If you don’t’ accept yourself but you’re also forcing others to be hide their identity, then it’s just your mind keeping you captive.
In the end we still can all work in the army, police force or supermarket. We can all still enjoy Amsterdam altogether, and if we really disagree on things, that’s fine. We don’t have to talk about those things. Find something else to talk about. We can have a fun conversation and great evenings, organise a BBQ — whatever. Have a good time instead of looking for things to disagree on. And we should do that more in society. Find what we agree on and focus on that, rather than the negative parts.
What advice would you give to a young artist who is still figuring out themselves?
Use your art to discover the world. It’s an easy tool to discover who you are, what you’re dealing with. It can help, and as long as you make art about yourself, there’s nobody else like that, so it’s unique art no matter what. The second you start copying other people’s work, it becomes other people’s work, and a lot of people do that already. So, make your own inspiration. And as long as you stick to yourself, work hard and good luck because it’s hard work. But it’s still fun. But be yourself because there’s only one you.
